A TRAITOR IN OUR MIDST

Where I work, in buttoned-down Bethesda, you wouldn't expect drama, rebellion and outright treason to play themselves out in the streets.

You'd be wrong.

First, someone quite unreasonably, I think, spraypainted the newspaper boxes for The Washington Times with one simple word: LIES. That was followed by the word SWILL on the USA Today boxes. Then, the same person hit the parking garage where I stow my Xtreme vehicle with an axiomatic motto, intended to demoralize those of us still contributing to the nation's GDP: COMMUTE WORK COMMUTE SLEEP. And now, the construction site for the Rio Grande, your typical chainy Mexican restaurant being built down the street, has been hit. The same objectively pro-Saddamite spraypainted an arrow pointing to a picture of Uncle Julio, the chain's grinning, sombrero-wearing mascot, and added the question: STEREOTYPE? Clearly this person is a divider, not a uniter, and clearly he hates freedom. Or at least chilie con queso.

Of course, you're no safer in the hinterlands. Check out this fifth columnist in my former place of residence. Fortunately, the Patriots at the paper were quick to run photos of the offending susbstances, let someone accidentally ingest some tabouleh.

THE HOLIDAYS ARE JUST FOUR SHORT MONTHS AWAY...



...not that I'm dropping hints or anything. Who knows, maybe I was just inspired by this heartwarming example of compassionate conservatism (scroll down to the comments for the full effect).

Or, if this all seems so three months ago, there's always this. A timeless classic which plays... a timeless classic.

HOW I SPENT MY SUMMER VACATION, PT. 2

Kids at the beach... This is exactly what summer vacation is all about. Nine hours in the car each way, listening to kids tunes involving SpongeBob, Dragontales and the confounded freaking religious vegetables thanks to an iPod whose battery refused to die... not so much.